Disclaimer: None of these events really happened. I just want to post this to make me feel good. This story is based on real people, real cars, and a store.

So I'm sitting down at Target chatting with Jason and Richard when they say I should race this Honda behind me. It looked spray painted...meaning it looked horrible. I close my hood to hide the engine, and walk over to see if his car was boosted or not...although I knew the answer already. So I get over there and this guy is bullshitting about how it has 'racing cams' in it and has these other mods. Only thing I could see was some blue wires...ooohhhhhh.

So I say 'Think you can beat a Taurus?' and I point over to my car. He says he doesn't think he's going to race and then someone talks him into it. I tell Richard to get in my car, and we get in. He asks me if I know how to brake torque...I had never heard the term before. He asks if he could drive and I let him. We pull out of Target following the Honda and while driving, the person in back who wanted a ride over to the street said that the cop that just passed us pulled a U turn. So we do not follow the Honda and instead take a different route to the street.

We get there and a 3rd car goes and marks the finish line. The person in the back of my car gets out and and gets in that car beforehand. So we line up, and his friend who is going to start the race tries to act like they do in Fast and the Furious...lol. He says 'Ready' and Richard presses the gas and break, revving it to about 2k rpms. He throws his hands down and Richard jumps the line by like, 1 second. He yells 'Go' and the tires stop spinning and the car launches forward. That Honda never stood a chance. Reaching 3850 RPMs as fast as we did allowed the car to pull even further away from the silly little stock Honda.

Richard, not knowing of this street, lets off the gas about 5 seconds before the finish line, and the Honda is able to pull up to about the driver side door. When we pass the line, we turn around and the person at the finish line says 'Dude you seriously won by like...3 feet.' Little did he know if Richard hadn't let off the gas that Honda would've been behind by like 4 car lengths.

So we get back to Target and his friend is like 'You wanna race for slips? I'll be driving the Honda this time...' I laugh inside my head. I decline, but Jason said he'd front me $20 if I wanted to race for $20. I say $20, he says $40, I say $30. He says 'I'll race for $30, but find a better road.' So Jason, Richard, me, and some other guy I can't remember brainstorm of a road. I go tell him, and he says 'I'll think about it..' But then the guy who drove the first time said he had to go pick up his 'sister' and chickened out.

Sad, I wanted $30.

What color was said civic? sis it look shitty flat black?

Yeah, it looked like it was spray painted black...although I couldn't tell. A guy with a lot of piercings was the original owner. But now some semi-emo dude was the owner.

$10 says that is owned by a kid named Chris Oliver

What does Chris Oliver look like?

was it a eg coupe or was it a crx, if it was the civic its a big peice of shit and i beleive it only has i/h/e i know the original owner and it was beat on bad , if it was the crx its chris olivers and its stock and really slow.

and chris oliver is the kid with all the peircings he used to own the civic too but sold it.

90% of the civics/CRXs in Kalamazoo and Portage are slow next to a crappy running SHO anyway....

I must be in that 10%

Yeah...I'd suppose Chris Oliver was there because there was a kid that had a LOT of piercings...especially the high-gauge ear piercings where I could stick my finger through (which is gross).

And yes that Civic was a HUGE pile.

Is yours the turbo'd flat black one? If so, you'd probably dust a crappy running SHO......









....what about a good running one?

most likely

that chris oliver kid was there.....and it WAS is car...but it sold it to some kid that thinks its hot shit....because of the racing cam and all (I shit you not, thats all these dudes talked about....)

supposedly, one of the kids that was riding in the car is going to bring a Beretta z-26 out this upcoming weekend to race someone for 200 or 400 bucks....he is trying to say it has a gtp drive train in it.. but the car is in lansing....."where he builds all his cars.." HA.... so if he shows up with it, he is going to loose some money.

i want my refund now plz


so

like

what?

Well when I wanted to race him for $30, his friend came over and said 'Why don't you get $200 together and you can race my Beretta.' We declined because my SHO is stock and he smiled when Richard asked if it was S/C.

Jason, another guy we were hanging out with, has an (L body?) Charger that we said would race the Beretta. The Beretta dude was like 'Well I gotta go get it, its all the way out in Lansing where I work on my cars.'

This one is mine. New (smaller) turbo and tune to come!

If this happens I want to watch his GLHS put bus lengths on the Beretta.

me to

yea, chriso is pritty cool, he doesnt boast on and on about his cars, he knows what they can do, and doesnt even beat on them, i thaught his clutch was slipping by the way he drives, so i talked him into letting me see if it was, it was perfect, and he got pissed i let out of the clutch so fast...

but as for the punk that baught his civic, i know who you are talking about, and all those little emo punks that go to the twisted development meets are kinda cocky about there cars... for the longest time saturdays were days i almost got in fights due to these punks...

i guess im just trying to defend a buddy here who someone knows his shit, and atleast knows his car isnt fast...



as for races, when i get my STE Turbo done, il race any SHO just for the fun of it...

what, why do you guys hang out with dudes with slow cars, and then post about it

what?

::edit::

serious, reading about slow cars beating other slow cars,

huh?

i can't wait to get back in the garage